The PR Psychological Exam

I’ve devised a highly technical and sophisticated new psychological exam that puts Myers-Briggs and Rorschach to shame.  My only criticism of it is that perhaps it is pedantic, but hey I’m just so thorough in everything I do.

It’s called the PR test and it can determine certain characteristics of a person by what they immediately think of when they see the letters PR in succession.

For example if you see PR and think Puerto Rico, you are probably a minority, more specifically Latino.  There’s also a good chance you smoke weed and like porn.  You might also abuse public assistance, but it’s OK because it’s free.  See also Permanent Residency.

If you see Public Relations or Press Release you are probably a white-collar professional or yuppie.  At they very least you aren’t poor and went to college.  You are also likely to think low of people who see PR as Puerto Rico or permanent residency.

If you see PR as prime rib, pot roast or pork roll, well you are obviously fat.  If you aren’t fat then you at least you love to eat and incessantly work out or were blessed with the genes to not gain weight.  More likely though you simply can’t fit in any jeans.

If you see Pattern Recognition or Proportional Representation you probably like Star Trek and haven’t been laid in a while.  In fact, the highly complicated system indicates you may be a virgin. 

If you see Progesterone Receptor or Peripheral Resistance you are probably smarter than any of the other groups, but also humble.  You didn’t think Doogie Howser was far-fetched because they based it on your life.  See pattern-real.

If you see Payroll you work in PR or are a Jew… or both.

If you see Pakistan Railways you are a Muslim or a terrorist, not that there’s a difference.

If you see Punt Returner you are a sausage.

And lastly if you see Pet Rock you are a dumbass.

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