Boomer & Carton SUCK!

For the life of me I don’t understand what people see in the Boomer & Carton show on WFAN.

First you have Boomer Esiason who is about as funny, witty and exciting as an empty can of Pringle’s.  Then you throw in his egregious smugness and I literally want to end his life with my bare hands, strangling him until his eyes pop out of his head like a jack in the box.  Added to which the guy never won shit, come on, can’t we get a winner?  He is to radio what the rainbow “broadcast is lost” picture is to TV.

Then you have Carton who, like every jock since, went to the Howard Stern school of broadcasting and got a D.  Note to Craig: not everything you say is funny, in fact, hardly anything of it is, but you certainly believe it to be true.  Kind of sucks for Craig that he does all the work but is still second fiddle to Boomer All In That Azz.  Watching on TV is even more insufferable, the way you see him constantly grab the mic as if to say, “let’s get intimate here, I’m one of you guys.”  Why do people in entertainment think every bald guy is the “everyman” relatable type?  Not to mention he has a voice made for braille. 

At least Craig seems likeable in real life, and in fact I’ve heard he is a really nice guy.  So Craig, The Cartel gives your shiny head having, “all right” saying in the really Guido way a pass.  Live it up, the Cartel doesn’t issue many passes.

Boomer, sorry motherfucker, we’re coming for you.  Because you suck on the radio and you owe us money!

Viva La Cartel!

3 Responses to “Boomer & Carton SUCK!”

  1. I couldn’t agree more which is why I stopped watching that shit a while ago.

  2. They compliment each other perfectly. They’re hilarity in a bottle. You don’t have a very good sense of humor. That’s judging by your taste in radio, and your dull, unfunny review. But I hear you’re a good person in real life. So I’ll give you a pass.

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